Balustrades, SO Hot

The trick to a really perfect story is to pick something that not many people are talking about…but something that’s on the edge of what people are talking about. What’s really hot right now? Moving underwater, of course, and the giant societal shift that’ll come when half the population or more is moving under the waves to start a new life. 

Oh, but it’s been done, darlings. Every journalist without a single creative bone in their body is combing every inch of this story for a new angle and coming up depressingly short, which is why the next episode of Bianca’s Broadcast Bites is going to focus on…balustrades. Glass stair balustrades! Melbourne has a thriving scene of them, with elegant balustrading in all sorts of places like an unsung hero. Pools, showers, glass partitions…oh golly, a well-done glass partition gives me goosebumps!

I want to dedicate an entire episode to telling this tale, spreading the word, getting right down to the nitty-gritty of this hot story and seeing what people really think of balustrading. What do glaziers think of balustrading? What are the opinions of you, the un-special, ordinary, rote, dull every-people? That’s right: this is a show where we get down to your level and talk to you little, unimportant people! How nice of us! Of me!

Oh, let those journalists sniff around in search of their underwater glass dome stories. They’re like a bunch of broken records, the lot of them…well, except for Scoop McGee, who’s got himself obsessed with this vigilante business. I’ll let him have that one. No thank you! He also needs to stop calling…it was one date, and nice enough, but I’m not really interested in a second go.

Anyway, glaziers and all of that exciting jazz. If you think glass repair done in Melbourne is hot right now, then just you wait until my Broadcast Bites makes it bigger than headline news. Glaziers will be stars. Stars, darlings!!