I’m totally shocked that Lorenzo Crowder got kicked out of this competition for reporting that his partner had done terribly in their collaborative task. Apparently, it was a trick to see which of them would be meaner to the other. Captain Fawcett glowingly reviewed Lorenzo, so he gets to stay, even though he’s going around telling everyone that we will be corrupted by the earrings of power. Yeah, right. I’m sure DarkLord37 gave us these rings and sent us on this adventure just to have us turn into his evil minions.
I do find it funny that No Knees got shell earrings that let him control the weather, while I have breeze earrings that allow me to increase the size of the waves. Figure that one out. It’s almost like DarkLord37 put absolutely no thought into what magical powers these earrings would have. I shouldn’t be complaining, though, given we got the earrings completely for free. They’re really high-quality as well. He’s a master of his craft, that’s for sure.
He’s certainly got us doing an interesting challenge on this random island we all docked at. There are only seven pirate captains left in the competition, and each of us has to prove that we have what it takes to win by wrestling a boar. It’s a big boar, too. I’m up next, and I’m honestly feeling pretty nervous. What I wouldn’t give to be at a shop that sells Melbourne-made earrings right now. That would be a much nicer place to spend my afternoon, rather than wrestling in the mud with an oversized pig.
It would also help if my magical earrings provided any benefit for this challenge. I can make waves bigger, meanwhile Kingswell the Furious has a ring that allows him to punch through things like they are made of cardboard. He’ll be fighting the boar last, for obvious reasons.
All I have to do is beat No Knees, and I should be fine. Let’s be honest, though. If I can’t beat a man without working legs at boar wrestling, I really don’t deserve to be here.
– Dagmar James