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Hedge My Allegiance

I’m not the kind of person to make sweeping statements, but I’m pretty sure I have the best configuration of hedges on my block, if not the whole suburb. Uniformly dense, green and coiffured to perfection, my hedges stand out from the crowd. There’s really no competition; you’d think no one else was even trying. …

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Don’t Like Tattoos

This may be an unpopular opinion, but I don’t really like tattoos. I know it sounds backwards and that I don’t want people to express themselves, but this is me expressing myself. I’m all for people doing what makes them happy and making statements to the world, but personally I just think they look ugly. …

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Scone With The Wind

My Great Aunt Mabel just called in at my workplace to tell me she’d won complimentary scones for a month at her favourite tea shop – something about filling in a customer feedback survey and getting all the answers right. While I was happy to hear this good news, I was in the middle of …

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Shopping Capital

Shopping on Chapel Street is what everyone thinks of when they hear the term “Fashion Capital of Australia.” South Yarra is a hub for fashion, sales and luxury, and I love seeing the excitement on someone’s face when they visit for the first time.  The stores range from the pinnacle of opulence to edgy grunge …

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A Chef’s Opinion

Being a professional chef for the last twenty years, has made me very critical of the quality of the food I serve and the food that gets served to me. It’s in my nature. Anyone who is somewhat good at their profession would be hyper aware of their work and the work of their competitors. …

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Dean Pad Deluxe

Finally, my time has come: I’m getting a private office. This is what I’ve been working for all these years. Forget the professional accolades, the awards and the personal satisfaction of achievement – it’s all about finally being able to dictate the finer points of my workspace. Now it’s simply a matter of figuring out …

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A Big Favour

My mother-in-law lives in a van. She’s not often the horrible in-law that you hear about, but the van doesn’t make it easy for us. The problem is, she doesn’t have a real place to call home. It’s great for her. Less so for us, because that means her default place to park the van …

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The Doomsday Device

Who knew that building a doom device would be so difficult? It’s complicated and expensive. These are the kind of things they don’t teach you at the STA (Super-villain Training Academy, not to be confused with the STA; the Superhero Training Academy). Not all of us took Bank Robbing 101, which means funds can be …

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In Hot Water

It seems like outdoor bathrooms are finally taking off. I feel like they were a fairly fringe concept just a few years ago – the sort of thing that people rigged up using an old tub they found on the side of the road, a DIY water heating system and some bamboo screening. Now it’s …

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